While I’ve been immersing myself in the 7 Days of Selfies, I’ve started to open up just another little part of me that has been hiding away.

It’s funny because, the more you do ‘self’ work, the more you realise that you are only just getting started.

18 months ago, I thought I had it all figured out (and even more so when I was 18) but now I realise, it’s time to EMBRACE the not knowing. To reach out to the little parts of me – even the mysterious and not-always-pleasant – aspects. To accept the discomfort that comes with momentary melancholy or every day unease. To check in and to open up to any little facets I’ve been hiding – because I know they’re there and trying to ignore them is just plain silliness!

In fact, anything we bury always seems to find a way of catching up and eking out of us in a myriad of ways. It’s all good and well to place a filter over our life or photoshop out the imperfections, but shying away from the WHOLE experience life has to offer is just half living, don’t you think?

 

The downside of filters

Back in the days of digital cameras, the flash had this innate ability to shine a beacon of light, washing out any imperfections and casting a glow around the subject. These days, we rely on the good old Instagram filter (Valencia is my personal fave) to take a Selfie from ordinary to artistic. And, as much as I love the idea of flawless alabaster skin (winning), I often wonder the impact of putting forward a mere fraction of ourselves into the world.

Where are the battle scars and the lines of character we have earned over years of being brave when we’re terrified, making the hard choices when it would be easier to curl up in a ball, and seeing a brand new direction through tear-filled eyes?

They’re washed out.

We use social media to ‘stay connected’ but by presenting only one version of our story to those who follow us.

They also allow us to create unrealistic visions of ourselves and a life we are cultivating by deleting the flawed photos and only posting the good stuff. And when things aren’t feeling so great, it’s a sudden and slippery slope to comparing with ‘the lives of others’ and also reminiscing on days gone by with a kind of melancholy that doesn’t always serve us.

 

Disconnecting from our self

I love social media, don’t get me wrong! But I do see the dangers that come from self editing. From hiding part of ourselves from others, but also from disconnecting from ourselves.

This morning, instead of plonking myself down in front of the computer like most days, I followed my instincts and headed out for a walk in the sun and stumbled upon some beautiful bushland just down the road. I just sat and breathed it all in and it dawned on me that I have been disconnecting from myself lately.

// Sheltering parts of me from coming to light. Hiding away when I don’t feel ‘enough’.

// Worrying what certain thoughts or concerns mean in moments when my defences are down (lately related to instability and work and money.)

// Fighting with too many sides of myself (“You’ve got this”, “You don’t have this”, “You should be grateful”, “Everything is amazing”, “This is freaking hard”)

// Not fully understanding what I got myself into going out on my own and starting my own business. I swear it’s just hit me, over six months in! And also not acknowledging what an incredible achievement that is!

// Worrying what others think of me if I drink too much coffee or over share in posts like this one, or binge watch True Blood.

// Pushing to the point of exhaustion out of fear instead of truly accepting that somethings will never be certain and just to trust. Even when I think I’ve got a handle on this one, it finds a way to show up again and again and I accept that it’s just part of the ride.

// Choosing to hide from the light sometimes when I’m being urged to step into it. Ah hello, Elle Magazine.

 

You create your reality

While walking out in the beautiful Sydney sun, it suddenly occurred to me that everything is a choice. What we choose to be, do, or have is almost entirely up to us. Sometimes when what we really want isn’t working out, it’s because we’re caught in a fear loop – telling stories to ourselves and believing them.

You create your reality.

And so do I.

The ups and downs of life are inevitable, something I keep telling myself. But to be able to accept that where we are is where we choose to be, while it seems obvious, there is something strangely comforting in understanding that we get a choice. Every day. Every minute. To take the left or the right and accept where that takes us.

Okay, so I spilled. I want you to know that no matter where you are in your journey, whatever path you’re currently on, that some days are harder than others. Some days are also freaking wonderful. The ups and downs, they’re just natural. But when you hide away from those real feelings, from showing up as your true self, you’re holding back from the wholehearted living that makes you really come to life.

Instagram does wonderful things for dodgy camera pics, but the real life filters are not gonna work, my friend.

You’ll feel it.

There’s a certain sort of genuine that comes with full acceptance of the layers of being you.

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+ Where have you been filtering yourself lately?

+ What have you been hiding away?

+ Are you creating the reality you want?

If you haven’t already, I’d love to have you in the 7 Days of Selfies eCourse. It’s free and it starts this Thursday, 7th of August. I’m probably never going to run it like this again. It’s 7 days of short, but potent, audios and FREE email support for this round only.

Don’t miss out, register here!

See you on Thursday (we’re kicking off with Self Awareness – the first selfie!)

 

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